Down So Long
by Feene
Summary: Raven angst. --;; Ever wonder what happened to Raven's family? No? Then you shouldn't be reading this, obviously...


"Whee... Raven fic! Bah. This's a lot worse—but a lot longer—than my Moonbay fic. And it's still got angst in it. Sorry to all you Van/Feene lovers out there... but I just had to do something with my favorite little villain. ^_~ Enjoy. Criticize. Don't flame."  
  
Disclaimer: You all could recite this by heart, so I don't think we need to make it any longer than necessary... I don't own this. So nyaa, you can't sue me. Oh, and the song is called 'Down So Long', by Jewel. Expect more songfics with her lyrics in them. I'm obsessed with her.  
  
***  
  
'It's cold down here,' Raven thought absent-mindedly, slowly pacing the confines of his secret base. Quiet, too. He had no idea where Shadow had disappeared to, and without the familiar presence of his organoid, the 'evil' pilot felt somewhat lonesome. And cold. Despite the fact that the temperature was broiling outside, thanks to the noonday sun, it remained like an icicle in his living quarters.  
  
"Though... it almost makes me feel sorry for Van. They must be dying out there right now." The thought of this made the teen smirk, gray eyes slanting upwards a bit. If anyone deserved to be stuck out there, delirious with thirst and heat, it was Van and his cronies. They had made enough people suffer already, more than he ever had. Not that he cared about that. Raven had no sympathy towards the pathetic pilots that couldn't even bring out the full potential of a pitiful little zoid. They deserved the swift and not-so-painless death he gave them. In fact, it was more like a lesson, rather than a punishment. A lesson that they'd never be able to learn from.  
  
With a listless sigh, he turned, stalking down the hallway. He knew this place, top to bottom. From his own private kitchen, he made his way down to the hangar, deciding he may as well look for Shadow. Raven hesitated slightly, boots clicking on the cold, sterile linoleum surface of the floor. Shadow... that's where all of this had started. With that dark organoid that he now considered a companion.  
  
- - -  
  
Sun sets 'cross the ocean  
  
I'm a thousand miles from, anywhere  
  
My pocketbook and my heart both just got stolen  
  
And the sun act like she don't even care  
  
- - -  
  
~Raven had been seven at the time. Innocent, careless... a typical little kid. He had a mom, and a dad at one point. But he'd disappeared mysteriously a year before, while researching something known only as an 'organoid'. A younger sister, whom he got along with like all siblings do. Meaning they were at each others throats every chance they got. Sibling rivalry was a common thing in the Mutsuki household.  
  
"Raven! Hunny, come on, we're going to be late!" chimed his mother from the doorway. She had such a sweet, melodic voice... something her daughter, Rook, had inherited. The little boy grinned wildly, showing off pearly little teeth. They were going on a vacation to New Helic City, maybe even go see the capital, where the Madam President resided. With a giggle, he bounded down the hallway, sprinting past his little sister as he headed towards the family Jeep.  
  
None of them would ever know what destruction was awaiting them on the road. How could they? It would be a fun, enjoyable vacation, and everyone was looking forward to it. Especially the two youths in the back, judging by their constant cries of, "Are we there yet?"~  
  
- - -  
  
The wind blows cold, when you reach the top  
  
It feels like, someone's face is strapped to the bottom of my shoe  
  
I got a plastic Jesus, a cordless telephone for ever corner of my room  
  
Got, everybody but you, telling me what to do  
  
- - -  
  
Raven closed his eyes, shaking his head, trying to rid himself of the memories like a dog would water. 'No. I don't need to remember. I didn't need them in the first place.' But still, the young teen knew this wasn't entirely true. He had been so attached to his little sister. They'd even looked vaguely alike. The same dark hair, slim build... but his eyes had always been darker, colder than hers. Always.  
  
"I don't need to remember this. They were weak... that's why they're gone now. Because they couldn't even fight off one stupid little organoid." A knot seemed to rise in his throat, another in his chest, constricting his lungs and hindering his breathing. He could still remember it all, crystal clear. But... he didn't want to! He didn't need these memories, any of this!  
  
He didn't need anyone.  
  
- - -  
  
But I've been down so long  
  
Ooh, it can't be long still  
  
I've been down so long  
  
That the end must be drawing near  
  
- - -  
  
~It had been a beautiful day for sight-seeing, despite the fact that they were in the middle of nowhere. Small patches of sage grass seemingly sprung out of nowhere, dotting the dry ground with flecks of green and yellow. Not a single cloud marred the sky, though this also meant there was no escape from the noonday sun. Less than half a mile to their left, Raven could even see the large, gaping crevice of a canyon, its walls stained scarlet and dust-brown. None of them noticed the little white glimmer that was rapidly approaching.  
  
"Mom... are we there yet?" Raven piped up, angling his head so that he could see around the front seat. He wished Rook hadn't taken that spot so quickly... he wanted to sit up front with his parent, instead of in the back seat!  
  
"We'll be there soon, hunny. Just a few more miles-" The woman's sentence trailed off, brown eyes gone wide. She appeared to be staring at the horizon, watching something move towards them.  
  
"Mommy? What is it?" Raven asked, distress in his tone. She never answered. Lower jaw falling open slightly, she swerved the vehicle away, towards their left. Towards the canyon.~  
  
- - -  
  
I look to everybody but me, to answer my prayers  
  
'Til I saw an angel in a bathroom, who said she saw no one worth saving, anywhere  
  
A blind man on the corner said it simple, like flipping a coin...  
  
Don't matter what side it lands on, if it's someone else's dime  
  
- - -  
  
"No!" Raven pounded his balled fist against the wall, fighting back with every ounce of strength the tears he felt coming. Rook... she hadn't deserved that fate. Neither of them had. If anyone deserved to die, it should have been him.  
  
At that moment, a low growl sounded behind him. He could hear the clanking footsteps of Shadow, his tail swaying from side to side. "Go away. I don't need you right now," the pilot muttered, his tone cold with anger and regret. Regret at having lost so much that fateful day.  
  
"This is all your fault, Shadow..."  
  
- - -  
  
But I've been down, so long  
  
Ooh, it can't be longer still  
  
I've been down, so long  
  
That the end must be drawing near  
  
- - -  
  
~Utter chaos ensued. No matter how much either of the children pleaded, their mother wouldn't turn around, would hardly respond at all. And that flash of light steadily grew larger in proportion, moving towards them deliberately, following their trail. Raven could still remember how terrified he had been... if they didn't run clear off the cliff, that evil presence would catch up with them. And he didn't want to think of what it might do.  
  
"...I want you two to be ready to jump, you hear?" whispered his mother suddenly. Her eyes were still wide, the fright in them visible, but something about the firm set of her jaw showed an underlying sense of pride. Both Rook and Raven nodded quietly, trying to remain as brave as their mother, though silent tears still trickled their way down their cheeks.  
  
"Raaargh!" With a rumbling snarl, the flash of light collided with the front of the Jeep, sending the entire thing spinning out of control. A few more yards, and they would all plunge down into that huge abyss of the canyon. Grabbing his younger sister firmly about the waist, Raven leapt off the side, rolling on the dry, cracked ground. He couldn't see anything through the rising dust and the blurry haze in his head. Clutching his sister tighter, trying to comfort her, Raven waited for the debris to settle...~  
  
- - -  
  
I take a trip, I catch a train, I catch a plane  
  
I got a ticket in my hand  
  
When a fat man my money  
  
And like cattle we all stand  
  
- - -  
  
The dark organoid rumbled quietly, lowering his head like a dog who had just been caught stealing a steak. He didn't understand what his master was upset about, but he got the general gist.  
  
The boy frowned, then glanced away, resuming his pacing. There was nothing he could do now. The memories came in constant flashes, imprinting themselves in his head, playing along like a movie. He could almost see the shimmering crimson liquid on his hands, not his own. Rook hadn't deserved anything like this.  
  
- - -  
  
But we've been down so long  
  
Ooh, it can't be longer still...  
  
- - -  
  
~"Phew... it's gone..." the young Raven whimpered, finally relinquishing his hold on his little sister. She didn't move, but he could still hear her swift, shallow breathing. "Rook, we ought to go check on... Rook, are you listening?" He turned, blinking, then paled. His sister forced an ever-so- faint smile, seemingly ignoring the fact that her entire abdomen was smeared with blood.  
  
'She's dying. My little sister is going to die...' he thought, momentarily stunned. Raven slowly sank to his knees, cradling his sibling gently, his little body wracked by sobs. "Don't cry... Rave'..." she murmured faintly, then gasped, closing her eyes. "I'm... just... fine..."  
  
Within moments, her spirit had escaped, and was finally set free.~  
  
- - -  
  
We've been down so long  
  
That the end, must be...  
  
I know the end, must be...  
  
Oh, I know the end must be drawing near...  
  
- - -  
  
Silent as a ghost, Raven drifted down the dark hallway, heading out to the hangar. He knew how to get rid of this pain in his chest, discard all the haunting memories.  
  
~He had been the only one to survive. His mother had plunged over the side of the cliff with their car, though she had doubtlessly been killed at the wheel by the explosion. And now Rook was gone, too.  
  
For days, the youth had traveled on foot to New Helic City, surviving on little water, and even less food. Even he had no idea of the alliance that would form several years later between himself and the murderous organoid.~  
  
"Shadow," he said sternly, making a vague gesture towards the Geno Breaker. With a half-nod, the organoid melded with his larger counterpart, enhancing the already formidable zoid.  
  
"I'm coming to get you, Van..." 


End file.
